Spring is about to come. It is the season for love and new start. Whatever us transgender people experienced in the last year, it’s time to put an end to it and embrace the new year. Let’s date and come out as who we really are. Yes, theoretically, it sounds great, but the problem does not lie with transgender people, but with cisgender people. They need to learn some basic rules which are suitable for everyone, every gender and every sexual orientation. Most cisgender men, including homosexual and heterosexual, are tagged with fetishism if they admit that they are interested in dating a transgender woman. Here is some advice for people who are dating a trans woman.
Dating a trans girl is just like trans dating any other girls. Dating a transgender woman requires the same amount of respect, sympathy and love. If you’ve ever dated anyone, then you have already known the essence, right? But if you are not, let me assure you that you can totally count on your cisgender dating experiences, because they are basically the same. Just ts date and live as you feel comfortable.
Educate yourself. This cannot be stressed enough. Transgender women are women and do not doubt that. She was assigned with the wrong body. You cannot tell one’s gender by the thing between its’ legs, but between its’ ears, that is the brain. She may even doesn’t realize that until she experienced gender disorder, which is exactly the cause made her a transgender person on order to eliminate such anxiety. Educate yourself knowledges about transgender people so that she won’t feel being a fetish. You can simply google it and you can find numerous of knowledge about transition surgery, medication, the employment status for transgender people, political background, living condition, etc. Try to know as much as possible. When she is ready for this conversation, she will be amazed by you for how much you know and how much you care.
Try not to focus on the genitals. Just imagine, you are set up with another girl by your friend. You are already nervous because you don’t like to be set up. You sit down and introduce yourself to this person. How would you feel if you are asked about the size of your genital? How does it look? Is it big? This is distressing, right? Well, this will be a thousand times awkward compared with trans dating. When the conversation for the whole night is all about gender recognition or ethnicity, that is much much worse. Make sure you treat your date just as you would treat others. She may know everything about transgender people and you may be very curious, but she is not here for spreading knowledge. She is here to date, to find love if it is possible. Therefore, educate yourself and don’t count on being educated.